Anadi Karama Phale
Sri Siksastakam Song 5
anādi'
karama-phale, poḍi' bhavārnava-jale, toribāre
nā dekhi upāy e-viṣaya-halāhale, divā-niśi hiyā jwale, mana
kabhu sukha nāhi pāy
I have fallen into the ocean of material existence as a result of my selfish activities, which are without beginning, and I see no means of deliverance from this great ocean of nescience. Day and night my heart burns from the poison of these worldly activities, and on account of this my mind never finds any satisfaction or happiness.
āśā-pāśa-śata-śata, kleśa deya avirata, pravṛtti-ūrmira
tāhe khelā kāma-krodha-ādi
choy, bāṭapāḍe deya bhoy, avasāna
hoilo āsi' belā
Hundreds and thousands of desires, like nooses around my neck, constantly give me misery and trouble. In that great ocean of nescience play the waves of materialistic tendency. In this world there are many thieves and rogues, of whom six are prominent; lust, anger, greed, illusion, and madness. They are causing me great fear, and in this way my life is coming to an end.
jñāna-karma--ṭhaga
dui, more pratārīya loi, avaśeṣe
phele sindhu-jale e
heno samaye, bandhu, tumi kṛṣṇa kṛpā-sindhu, kṛpā
kori' tolo more bale
The two highway robbers, mental speculation and fruitive activity, have cheated me and misled me, and finally they are throwing me into the ocean of misery. At such a time as this, my dear Krsna, You are the only friend, and You are the ocean of mercy and compassion. I have no strength to get out of this ocean of nescience, so I pray to Your lotus feet that You will be kind and by Your strength uplift me from this ocean of suffering.
patita-kiṅkore
dhori', pāda-padma-dhuli kori', deho
bhaktivinode āśroy āmi
tava nitya-dās, bhuliyā māyāra pāś, baddha
ho'ye āchi doyāmoy
Accept this fallen servant and fix me as a particle of dust on Your lotus feet. Kindly give me shelter to this Bhaktivinoda. O most merciful Lord, actually I am Your eternal servant, but having forgotten this I have become bound up in the network of maya.
Translation
I have fallen into the ocean of material existence as a result of my selfish activities, which are without beginning, and I see no means of deliverance from this great ocean of nescience. Day and night my heart burns from the poison of these worldly activities, and on account of this my mind never finds any satisfaction or happiness.
Hundreds and thousands of desires, like nooses around my neck, constantly give me misery and trouble. In that great ocean of nescience play the waves of materialistic tendency. In this world there are many thieves and rogues, of whom six are prominent; lust, anger, greed, illusion, and madness. They are causing me great fear, and in this way my life is coming to an end.
The two highway robbers, mental speculation and fruitive activity, have cheated me and misled me, and finally they are throwing me into the ocean of misery. At such a time as this, my dear Krsna, You are the only friend, and You are the ocean of mercy and compassion. I have no strength to get out of this ocean of nescience, so I pray to Your lotus feet that You will be kind and by Your strength uplift me from this ocean of suffering.
Accept this fallen servant and fix me as a particle of dust on Your lotus feet. Kindly give me shelter to this Bhaktivinoda. O most merciful Lord, actually I am Your eternal servant, but having forgotten this I have become bound up in the network of maya.
Prabhupada commentary
Anādi karama-phale. Anādi karama-phale pori' bhavārṅava-jale taribāre nā dekhi upāya. This is a song sung by Bhaktivinoda Ṭhākura depicting the picture of the conditioned soul. It is said here, Bhaktivinoda Ṭhākura is speaking, taking himself as one of the ordinary human being, that due to my past fruitive activities, I have now fallen in this ocean of nescience, and I do not find any means of coming out of this great ocean. It is just like the ocean of poison, e viṣaya-halāhale, divā-niśi hiyā jvale.
As, if anyone takes some pungent food, it burns the heart, similarly, as we are trying to be happy by sense enjoyment, actually it is just becoming the opposite, a cause of burning our heart. E viṣaya-halāhale, divā-niśi hiyā jvale, that burning sensation is going on twenty-four hours, day and night.
Mana kabhu sukha nāhi pāya, and on account of this my mind is not at all in satisfaction. Āśā-pāśa-śata-śata kleśa dey abirata, I am always making plan, hundreds and thousands, how I shall become happy, but actually all of them giving me trouble, pains, twenty-four hours.
Pravṛtti-ūrmira tāhe khelā, it is exactly like the waves of the ocean, always dashing one another, that is my position. Kāma-krodha-ādi caya, bāṭapāre dey bhaya, besides that, there are so many thieves and rogues. Especially they are six in number, namely lust, anger, envy, illusion, and so many ways, they are always present, and I am afraid of them. Abasāna hoilo āsi' belā, in this way, my life is becoming advanced, or I am coming to the point of end.
Jñāna-karma ṭhaga dui, more pratāriyā loi, although this is my position, still, two kinds of activities, namely mental speculation and fruitive activities, they are cheating me. Jñāna-karma ṭhaga, ṭhaga means cheater. There are jñāna-karma ṭhaga dui, more pratāriyā loi, they are misleading me, and abaśeṣe fele sindhu-jale, after misleading me, they bring me on the seashore, and pushes me down within the sea.
E heno samaye bandhu, tumi kṛṣṅa kṛpā-sindhu, under the circumstance, my dear Kṛṣṅa, you are the only friend, tumi kṛṣṅa kṛpā-sindhu. Kṛpā kori' tolo more bale, now I lave no strength to get out of this ocean of nescience, so I request, I pray unto Your lotus feet, that by Your strength, You kindly pick me up.
Patita-kiṅkare dhari' pāda-padma-dhūli kori', after all, I am Your eternal servant. So, somehow or other, I am fallen in this ocean, You kindly pick me up, and fix me as one of the dust of Your lotus feet.